Day 24 of gratitude month

So today was a public holiday, the 24th of December 2020. I had the privilege to sleep in and watch movies and sleep all day. It is quite a life. I enjoyed my day. I normally get headaches but today i did not even meed any painkillers. I played with my cat, took a long hot bath. Life can not be sweeter than this. I realised that I did not overeat today. I was rarely hungry so that is definitely a good sign. I hope i eat like a normal person and healthy options.

I will take this opportunity to try and have new habits for handling stress that comes with my trade, for when i go back to work. I saw some breathing exercises on youtube, meditation and yoga. I have started all of those to get me in a good mood in the next two weeks. It is quite relaxing.

So i was watching Taylor Swift’s “Miss Americana” on Netflix today. I started crying i think less than 5 minutes into it. I have been emotional of late but i never could cry. I have to say it is a good feeling to just release these emotions and just cry. I cried so good and i feel free, i let out a good number of toxins 😁😁😁

I loved hearing her side of her own story. I am so glad she took control of her narrative and cleared up some stuff that actually made me to relate to her story. I have to admit I did not like her at all. I had nothing against her but the media sort of built up a bad image of her in my mind such that even though I did not know her i automatically hated her and her music. Such a shame because she is talented.

I started sort of tolerating her after her court case but just ignored her after that. Today I learnt so much about life. I learnt that you can not just believe everything you hear and sometimes you need both sides of the story. I would know best since i have been accused when i couldn’t speak for myself too.

I can relate to being a person whose belief system was built around applause and compliments. I have been struggling with this and self hate and self-deprecation for a long time. This has led to so many bad coping mechanisms. Sometimes i wish i had a problem with not eating than eating too much but i guess that is an unhealthy thought on its own. I am addressing these thoughts and i don’t need themπŸ™‚

I am just happy that today was relaxing and i got to learn and remove one more person from the list of people i dislike πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„ silly me… i mean what did she ever do to me πŸ€·β€β™€οΈπŸ€·β€β™€οΈπŸ€·β€β™€οΈ Anyways I am just happy to be on holiday.

I am a loner so there isn’t much happening in my life so my vacation is just going to consist of mostly me and relaxing. I am totally happy to be getting a break.

Merry Christmas everyone βœŒβœŒβœŒπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ€—πŸ€—

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