My “That day” songs

If you have ever dealt with depression you will know how some days are just darker than the others. For me some days I do not even open my curtains and I do not want any light at all. It screams out loud at me and all I want is peace and quiet, my mind is pretty loud during that time you see. I love noise, do not get me wrong, I genuinely love loud music because it is loud and organized noise. So I can close my curtains and put some songs with a beautiful melody that can serenade me into happiness again. Music is a great therapist and we thank God for YouTube because God knows I would never be able to afford the volume of songs that I listen to per week. I really buy only the songs that I want to listen to for extended periods of time but the rest I stream online.

I have a playlist on my YouTube account called my that day songs, this is because there is always that one day every now and then that my normal songs will not be interesting. On that day everything is boring. I always feel like crying on that day. I have no idea what usually triggers them but it just so happen that in those days all I need is a good cry and good music. Winters are so good for me physically as I like cold weather but so terrible for me mentally as both my parents died in winter and the lack of sun, I love poetry on those days too, or classical pieces or instrumental music.

So here’s 6 of the songs on my playlist of my that day songs;

Sweet Dreams – Universe Cowards
Their lyrics got me crying, the mood is sentimental and I really love it. I know it was made with the intention of being funny on the tv show but the lyrics are super deep and I love them. I always think of my parents during this time. My memories of them are fading and I just want to remember them with a smile.

When the last wind blows, the day comes to an end.
Even if the pictures with our memories fade
I want to remember with a smile, even if the end is near,
Even if we have to say goodbye someday,
Even if it’ll disappear immediately tomorrow…

Falling Blossoms – Universe Cowards

The first time I watched the video I felt like crying for days. Now I do not cry in fact it brings me comfort and their voices soothe me whenever I am down.

In case my pain is noticed, I smoothed out my heart
I hope I can erase the memories and forget you
I don’t know why I treated you so bad all of those times are still so cruelly clear
When I was endlessly wandering, I didn’t know back then, Now I’m afraid, Oh Goodbye Long Goodbye
The more I love you, the more it hurts
This longing has grown even thicker, It endlessly tortures me

Timeless – Nct U

It’s strange, even after a long time, my heart keeps repeating that day
When I close my eyes, my memories take me to that place again
I try to hold out my hand to touch you, But I can’t
I endlessly practiced these words; I still love you.
But in the end, I could not say it, I shouldn’t let you go
I’m waking up from this dream that’s like reality.
Swallowing up another day that’s like a nightmare.
But which is real? In my world without you
The only thing I have is to dream of you,
when I close my eyes my memories take me to that place again

Those lyrics!!!! It is because of those lyrics…I am a woman who used to hide her pain. I fake cried when my father died, I thought people would think I am weird so I cried. I went through a dramatic change after that and even though I was not easily broken, I still held on to the blame I had on my parents’ death. I blamed them for everything I was going through so I kept going. However when I felt I had made it out alive, I missed my dad so much. So I started crying for him in my twenties and I always do, I mean when you grow up you treasure your parents more than when you are a kid anyway. So almost every love song reminds me of him, he broke my heart, I know technically it is not his fault but still. I love and miss him so much. But I miss my mum way more than my dad even if I do not know what she looks like.

The Way To Say Goodbye – Onestar

My complicated mind I am afraid someone will see it,
So, I’m trying to pretend to smile actually I’m suffering more than anyone after so many days.
This can be forgotten silently, I’ll move along and love someone else like that

I do not think this song is as popular as I want it to be and I feel like its a very nice song. I love it so much.

Message to Bears – You Are a Memory

The instrumental speaks to my inner being. The lyrics not so much. That audio is gold….I imagine myself watching the sunset in an isolated beach island in the middle of nowhere and sipping orange juice… the environment so quiet so serene. This is the stuff that I live for.

Sleeping At Last – Saturn

This was referred to me by a relative of mine. I love this song so much. How rare and beautiful it is to even exist? I love the melody, the voice and the lyrics. Likewise I always take myself to a beautiful and peaceful place where I am alone just being myself and enjoying a beautiful environment and clean air. I really can not explain enough the reason why it belongs to the list of my that songs, I just know that it was meant to be heard by my ears 😁

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